In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
How external is "for external use only"?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
