I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
