Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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