i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
