i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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