why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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