A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
