Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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