Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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