The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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