She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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