Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
