Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
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