why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize