I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize