miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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