Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
