I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Bang-toberfest begins!!
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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