Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
