found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
