I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize