i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
