their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
My hand turned me down
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
