Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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