DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize