Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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