All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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