even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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