That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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