yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize