White coat. Heels.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
