I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
