he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
