That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
