Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize