Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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