i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
We're too hungover to prance.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
