have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
