Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize