her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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