I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
