At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
