she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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