Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
