I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
