If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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