Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
