Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
