I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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