last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
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