i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
